Grab your kite gear, lots of sun block and go for it.   

During our house hunting trip last year May, we already discovered the beach at the Blue Lagoon/Amara (Najomtien).  We moved to Thailand in August, and my husband did a kite boarding course in September.  My daughters wanted to do windsurfing.  I was thinking, “Ok, do they expect me to lay on the beach?”

Without notifying me, my husband and the kite-instructor organized kite boarding lessons for me!  I was very excited, but reserved in my enthusiasm.  After my first lesson I felt really enthusiastic although this was only the beginning of the fun.

When the course was finished I was expected to buy my own kite gear.  A point of making up my mind.  I decided to go for it!  Only by practicing could I make improvements.

Ok: my kite ended once in the trees, and another time in the roses, but when I had my first good ‘run’ on the board, I had a blast.  When I saw the beach boys looking surprised and my husband looking jealous, I thought, “WOW!!”.

Also, my Thai vocabulary extended: the Thai word for kite is wow!

Marja Hofman                                                                       photo from amasc

Q:  Why do people clink their glasses before drinking a toast?

A:  It used to be common for someone to try to kill an enemy by offering him a poisoned drink.  To prove to a guest that a drink was safe, it became customary for a guest to pour a small amount of his drink into the glass of the host.  Both men would drink it simultaneously.  When a guest trusted his host, he would then just touch or clink the host’s glass with his own.

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Q:  What do bulletproof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser printers all have in common?

A:  They were all invented by women.

◊  Men can read smaller print than women can; women can hear better.

◊  Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.

◊  The percentage of Africa that is wilderness:  28%

◊  The percentage of North America that is wilderness:  38%

When his .38 caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended victim during a hold-up in Long Beach, California, would-be robber, James Elliot, did something that can only inspire wonder.  He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again.  This time it worked.

Second Place Winner:

The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat cutting machine and after a little shopping around, submitted a claim to his insurance company.  The company, expecting negligence, sent out one of its men to have a look for himself.  He tried the machine, and he also lost a finger.  The chef’s claim was approved.

Third Place Winner:

A man who shoveled snow for an hour, to clear a space for his car during a blizzard in Chicago, returned with his vehicle to find a woman had taken the space.  Understandably, he shot her.

In the second week of December, Nobuko, a Japanese friend and member of PILC, invited the three of us to a Japanese Tea Ceremony.

None of us had ever imagined what this exactly was, and so we were highly impressed by this act of culture.  It’s the ultimate manner of enjoying tea in order to reach harmony of soul and body.

We appreciated to have Nobuko’s and also her teacher’s trust, because our friend is still a student for tea ceremony.  They showed us the secrets about the art of the Japanese tea ceremony.

It was a wonderful experience and hopefully we can invite them to come to a PILC meeting in April 2010 for a demonstration.  Wouldn’t that be great???

Johanna, Judy, and Dzenana

A lady is having a bad day at the tables in Las Vegas.  Down to her last $100, completely exasperated, she cries, “What rotten luck!  What in the world should I do now?”

A gent next to her, trying to calm her down a bit, calmly suggests, “I don’t know… Why don’t you play your age?”  He walks away.  Moments later, he is intrigued to hear a great commotion at the roulette wheel.  Maybe, she won!

Rushing back to the table and pushing his way through the crowd, he is stunned to see the lady lying limp on the floor, with the table operator kneeling over her.  He asks, “What happened?  Is she all right?”

The operator replies, “I don’t know, buddy… She put all her money on 29.  When 36 came up, she fainted!”

It was the beginning of December and I decided to clean out my ‘messy corner’.  With large black garbage bag in hand, I dug deeply into the dark corner.

Out they came – big bags, little bags, fat ones and skinny ones, full ones and half empty ones – all unceremonially emptied into the black garbage bag.  Finally no bags left and a garbage bag almost full to overflowing. 

What am I on about??  The Ring Pulls, that’s what!

Yes, can you believe that in the 6 months PILC have been collecting the ring pulls from their cans, I had gathered such a huge collection?!!!!!

So, staggering under the weight of the bag, I high-tailed it down to the Queen Vic to deliver our collection.  The look of delight on Malcolm’s face when he realised what was inside was a treat to behold.  He asked me to pass on Dr. Therdchai’s grateful thanks and assured me that they will be put to very good use.

The ring pulls are used to make artificial limbs for poor amputees, regardless of nationality or religion.  Thailand has 40,000 patients with missing legs, with numbers rapidly rising.  So, ladies, carry on drinking, pulling and donating the tabs, which I will continue to collect at the PILC Coffee and Lunch mornings.

Cheers,  Lynne Richards

Q:  Why are people in the public eye said to be “in the limelight”?

A:  Invented in 1825, limelight was used in lighthouses and stage lighting by burning a cylinder of lime which produced a brilliant light.  In the theatre, performers on stage “in the limelight” were seen by the audience to be the center of attention.

Q:  In golf, where did the term “caddie” come from?

A:  When Mary, later Queen of Scots, went to France as a young girl (for education and survival), Louis, King of France, learned that she loved the Scot game “golf”.  So he had the first golf course outside of Scotland built for her enjoyment.  To make sure she was properly chaperoned (and guarded) while she played, Louis hired cadets from a military school to accompany her.  Mary liked this and when she returned to Scotland (not a very good idea in the long run), she took the practice with her.  In French, the word cadet is pronounced ‘ca-day’ and the Scots changed it into “caddie”.

The longest recorded flight of a chicken was 13 seconds.

Birds need gravity to swallow.

The most commonly used letter in the alphabet is ‘E’.

The least used letter in the alphabet is ‘Q’.

The 3 most common languages in the world are Mandarin Chinese, Spanish and English.

‘I am.’ is the shortest complete sentence.

‘Skiing’ is the only word with double ‘i’.

‘Dreamt’ is the only word that ends in ‘mt’.

        A young lady stops by her grandmother’s house on the way to a dance.  She wants to introduce her boyfriend to her grandmother.  As they are chatting, her boyfriend spies some peanuts on the coffee table.  He begins munching on them as they converse.

After about an hour, they are getting ready to leave and he thanks the grandmother for her hospitality and especially for the peanuts.

“Oh, you’re welcome young man,” she says.  “I appreciate you finishing them up.  Ever since I lost my dentures I can only suck the chocolate off of them.”